MOKING LAW DRAWS FLAK FROM PASSENGERS

MOKING LAW DRAWS FLAK FROM PASSENGERS

              Nude Elli, 007 Flag March

The announcement by the Railway Minister of a new law concerning moking on all railway platforms in the nation has drawn widespread condemnation from the nation. News analysts are puzzled, political columnists are simply flummoxed and rail passengers are railing over this announcement.

“This is sibbly adother bloy by the railways to bake the bassejgers bay through their doses add catch the buther of all codes”, a passenger was heard fuming thru the cold in his nose (though, to your correspondent, this remark sounded as cryptic as the railway minister’s announcement).

A puzzled analyst (who shall remain unnamed because your correspondent forgot to note down his name – we shall call him the p.a. for the sake of brevity) said that the minister should have taken both Houses, and householders, housewives and him (the p.a.) into confidence before dropping this bombshell. “This dropping is nothing but a confidence trick. I shall get to the bottom of it and unravel it very soon”, he declared.

Meanwhile, mob scenes were witnessed at almost all the major railway stations as passengers refused to enter the railway platforms, preferring, instead, to wait for their trains on the roads. 

Railway officials tried to pacify them by announcing that there would be one more announcement soon. They, however, refused to remove the notices which had come up overnight on the platforms, announcing

“NOSE MOKING ON ALL PLATFORMS. 

BY ORDER – SPDT (E) NJRW, CMF, 3XEWJR.”

It may be recalled that the railway minister, in the course of his budget speech, had announced that a new act would come into force forcefully and suddenly to ensure that there would be nose moking on all railway platforms and strict action would be taken against defaulters.

Meanwhile, this mysterious new NOSE MOKING act has spawned all kinds of new business activities.  Traders have appeared on the platforms, selling “nose mokers” costing anything from Rs. 53 upwards (a leading brand, NO-MO, appears to be a simple contraption which, the manufacturers claim, “can be easily assembled by any qualified veterinary surgeon or oil well engineer without any assistance”). The media has also joined in – a new serial, called MOKERS AND SHAVERS and anchored by the well known TV personality, Alot  Naak, has appeared on the satellite network, featuring nose-to-nose talks with prominent clean shaven men and women who have a nose for such things.

(Watch out for this programme on STARTLE TV featuring the editor of your very own paper – “the klin klin man with a mike and a pen” – Ted, the ed.)

- © SK,  May 2011