BOLT FROM THE BLUE

Bolt from the Blue

Superman has renounced US citizenship.

India has immediately offered to make him an Indian citizen;

Tamil Nadu welcomes him to make Chennai his home provided, of course, he agrees to be called Supermaniyen, and will give him a free TV set and a mixer-grinder;

Karnataka wants him to live in Bangalore and will allot allot him a 50x80 site in Dollars Colony;

Jharkhand will honour him with the title of “Mahapurush”, a cash purse of Rs. 5001 and a buffalo;

Infosys will invite him to take over as the new Chairman of the company provided he is under the retirement age of 60 and can produce his birth certificate;

Superman is terribly confused and is thinking of re-claiming US citizenship!

HIGHWAYMAN GETS HARD LABOUR

HIGHWAYMAN GETS HARD LABOUR

              Benglur, 07 Still Marching

Notorious highwayman Lal “Bad” Shah, a.k.a. Little Red Riding Hoodlum, who had created  terror  among  the Moneyed  People and Money Looting Activists of the region, was to-day sentenced  to  ten years of hard labour by Mr. Kadee Sazaa Sunaanewala, Chairperson of the Watchdog Committee of the Punishments Wing of the Horse and Pony Riders Confederation, in the city to-day.

Mr. Sunaanewala, while talking to reporters after the swearing-at-cum-sentencing ceremony, vehemently denied that it had any connection with the allocation of portfolios by the CM.

- © SK,  May 2011

JHANKAR GETS LABOUR

JHANKAR GETS LABOUR
Bangalore, 07 March
The CM to-day allocated the portfolio of Labour and Labour Oriented State Topics (LOST) to his trusted alligator, Mr. Payal K. Jhankar, after two whole days of intense discussions with the dealers of his party. He described the entire process as “tedious and laborious”. The new minister himself, who was all along looking lost, said that this was most unexpected but he was happy now that he had become the LOST minister.

The new LOST minister will take charge of his ministry after he locates it.

HIGH DRAMA AS BULLS RUN RAMPAGE ON THE LAL STREET

HIGH DRAMA AS BULLS RUN RAMPAGE ON THE LAL STREET
Bumboo Bajaar, 27th Distemper
Red Street (commonly called The Lal Street), a famous lane in the bustling Bumboo Bajaar, where the continent’s leading stick brokers meet to exchange blows, was in a tizzy this morning as thirteen well-built bulls, armed with sharp horns, ran amok in the stick market, causing even the stocky brokers to run for cover. Passersby were treated to an unexpected filmy style chase as the brokers, sticks held high above their heads and chanting “danda ooncha rahe hamara” ran like men possessed, followed by the incensed bulls keen on dispossessing them. The bull run continued till late in the evening and ended only when the market’s top hoarder put up a hoarding on top of the street reading “SILENT ZONE – SHARP HORNS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN” and then followed it up by announcing the same over a loudspeaker.
The sher index, which is an indicator of the level of bravery, measured on the Rictus scale, plummeted badly and, when last seen, appeared to be headed Down Under.
Agitated members, many of them nursing bruised limbs and broken egos, called a press conference and announced the formation of a thirteen member committee headed by a retired matador (thirteen seater diesel version) to conduct a thorough investigation into the whole episode.

C H I N T A - M O N E Y
(Thoughts For The Day)

All that glitters has a silver lining
– Chevaux Coumarz, thinker

The hand that cradles the rock can’t count the money
– old jungle saying

The rain in Spain falls mainly on the ground
– old jingle

HOWZZATT? If you don’t draw blood first time, call for the third vampire
– Dracu’s law